6 Steps: Creating a Path to Extraordinary Willpower

Some would say that I have incredible willpower and that if I want something I’ll do my best to achieve it… Hhmmm, I guess I do. But do I really?

I think, I’ve always struggled with understanding what willpower truly is. Is willpower a constant and machinelike strength – which some magical people poses – that makes you continue a task, even if it feels like everything is going against you finishing it? Is it an unwavering believe and confidence located deep inside some people, making them so strong that they don’t even doubt, for one second, that they’re doing the right thing? Or maybe the art of incredible willpower comes down to having a goal, pushing yourself (even on those days, when it’s SO much more tempting to stay in bed, eat marshmallows and watch the Graham Norton Show on YouTube all day… I highly recommend that show, by the way, but be warned! You might just end up wanting to stay in bed and binge-watch all day… Proceed at own risk!) and trusting that all your hard work will pay off in one way or another?

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Maybe it’s Maybelline

Maybe you’re born with it or maybe it’s (Maybelline) a skill that you can learn? Like learning to do the dishes – right after dinner – or doing the laundry before you’re down to your last pair of socks.

I don’t know! But I’ve made it my personal and professional mission to find out. So, here’s to incredible willpower and to finally figuring this out!

When I search the internet for clues – and sometimes read a book on the subject – a few hints and clues begin to show up and give me the feeling that someone out there just might have the answer to this mystery.  It might just be possible to become a person with Extraordinary Willpower.

So, what does it take to morph yourself into this seemingly strong and confident, hard working person that most of us want to become?

What I’ve found

So far, I’ve narrowed it down to a few interesting steps/concepts – a few I use already and some I desperately need to work on a little more – that might just be the key to increasing your willpower and help you become one of those people who can truly say “I do possess extraordinary willpower… and because of it, I’m well on my way to creating the life of my dreams”.

6 Steps: Creating A Path to Extraordinary Willpower


1. The big defining step is figuring out, “What do I want?”

To utilize your willpower magic, you need to really understand what it is that you want to achieve. What do you want? How will it look and feel? What will it taste like, smell like and how will it fit into your life?

It’s hard to stay motivated on achieving something if you don’t really understand what it is you’re working to achieve.

I’ve personally done a few things to tap into what it is that I want, everything from creating dream boards – online (try these online tools Canva.com or coogle.it) and with magazine cutouts – writing long letters to myself, describing in detail what my dream and intention for the future is, and experimenting with different meditation exercises (try out my free guided meditation), but I could definitely do more…

2. And then comes the fear and doubt (also known as your insecurity)

Ahh, how I love this part…

To be honest, when I really look closely at my inner mental machinery, my insecurity plays a huge part in slowing down my production of willpower.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not paralyzed by fear or insecurity, but – like most others – I struggle against waves of fear and insecurity every day. We all do!

We have this tendency to protect ourselves against hurt and pain, and we do that by wrongfully making things seem more dangerous or harder than they really are.

And then we make excuses to avoid doing things that might scare us or make us insecure! ‘I really don’t have time to work on that screenplay…’, ‘I need to cancel my date tonight… I don’t have anything nice to wear!’ or ‘I’m too tired to make it to dance class today!’.

3. Fight or flight

We are, as humans, programmed with an instinct to fight or flight, it’s a primal thing and it comes down to pure survival.

If something scary comes our way, something that seems to be above our level of strength (mental or physical), we tend to seek the solution of running away. We don’t want to take the chance of getting our but’s kicked or worse… end up as a failure.

4. From dream to planning

Apparently, for willpower to become magical, we need to implement a very important factor… ACTION!

This is where Push comes to Shove.

So, we’ve identified our dream, we can see it, taste it and almost feel it… but unfortunately this is where most people get stuck, and never experience true willpower. Raise your hand if you’ve been there!

Figure out what you need to DO to make your dream happen. Then go do it.

Every day!

5. We need more love, people!

I personally don’t think that it is possible for us to have the magic of willpower all day, every day.

It’s natural to experience low points, lazy days, to feel tired and maxed out… and it’s okay. Don’t beat yourself up for needing some time to recuperate and re-energize.

To make any magic happen on any level, we need to show more love… Self-love that is!

It’s easy to lose “the power of will” in the frenzy of daily life. We need to allow ourselves to slow down, pump the breaks, relax and listen.

When it comes to the importance of self-love and the effect it has on our willpower and overall quality of life, I like to use the symbol of the CUP…

If your cup is full, then you have no problem pouring water into other cups (projects, realizing dreams, showing love to others etc.), but if your cup is empty or half way there, it gets harder pouring without running dry!

Fill up your own cup first!

Take out quiet time alone every day to reflect, read, write, and to hear yourself think. Give yourself the time and space to feel your feelings and organize your thoughts so that you may stay in touch with your own needs and desires for your life.

6. Don’t let a failure dim the light of your willpower

It’s so easy to fall into the trap of letting a previous failure (or 20) hold you from following your heart and dream.


Some smart people say that the best way to look at failure – past and future – is to see it as a tool, a learning step, a guide and as a motivation to move forward. Nothing worthwhile will be achieved whiteout experiencing failure along the way.
When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Thomas A. Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”
Use your failure to fuel your magical willpower… Stay curious!

My conclusion

As I mentioned in the beginning: Some people might look at me and see a person with extraordinary willpower, and I might have a few tricks up my sleeve, but I still struggle and constantly remind myself to hustle and get things done on time.

My point is: It might look like some people are blessed with the magical gift of extraordinary willpower, while others are left to fight a hopeless uphill battle.

But maybe the truth is that even the most productive and willpower-sufficient people constantly need to maintain a balanced and somewhat healthy approach to life, to maintain their willpower… Maybe they’ve just figured out the formula and now reap the benefit?

If that’s the case, it means that it’s there for everyone to discover! Right?

Let me know if you have any experience, secrets, tips or tricks for increasing your willpower, I would love to hear them. Maybe you just have some thoughts on the subject that you would like to share? Please go ahead and share your thoughts in the comment section below!

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