4 Life Lessons on How to Love Yourself More

What if you simply devoted this year to loving yourself more? What would happen and would you be able to see, feel and experience a difference in your life because of it?

That’s the question I asked myself as I was saying goodbye to 2016…

When a year is about to reach it’s end and a new year is about to show it’s fresh and untouched beginning, I always reflect on my life and ask myself these questions; what went wrong… what could I do better… what do I want to change… what did I love doing… and what would I love to see more of in the following year?

This year, I just knew in my gut that I wanted to feel what it’s like to love myself completely… respect myself… and understand what it’s like to be my own best friend.

I wanted to figure out if it was possible to reach this ultimate state of self-acceptance. What would it feel like… and what would it take, to finally create the relationship that I’ve always known I wanted, but never really seem to be able to create?

So, I decided to make 2017 the year… It became my purpose and I wanted to dive in and really succeed this time. I didn’t just want another great idea, that I then would forget about after a few weeks. I wanted to make sure I was constantly reminded of my intention…

I wanted to create a subtle change (with a huge impact), because I know from personal experience that if I spontaneously decide to take on a mountain, I’ll quickly loose interest, momentum and I’ll fall flat on my face with exhaustion within one day, only to return to my usual mindset and habits.

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The image that started it all

The first thing I did was to create an image with the perfect dimensions for my iPhone and the question: What if you simply devoted this year to loving yourself more?

So that every time I open my iPhone to check my messages, call, e-mail or just procrastinate, I’m reminded of the one thing that’s my most important mission this year.

Even though I’ve become used to it by now and I don’t really notice it anymore, it’s still there… unconsciously reminding me that I need to be kind and loving towards myself.

Feel free to download it and use it for yourself, if you want to remind yourself to be kinder, more loving and forgiving of yourself daily.

There are still 9 months left of 2017, and I still have a lot to change and learn, regarding loving myself more and being my own best friend, but I’m already beginning to see huge improvements.

My internal dialog has improved, and I use less energy worrying about my body and my presence in this world. I make an honest effort to feel and look good, but I also allow myself makeup free days (without feeling naked and washed out, which I used to before). I’ve accepted and come to terms with feelings I’ve been ignoring and cast aside for 8 years, and life just seems much lighter than it did 3 months ago.

What I’ve learned so far

So, you might think: That’s all good, but what did you do to love yourself more and what did you learn?

What I learned was: Creating a loving relationship with yourself, isn’t as simple as deciding to love yourself more… you need to improve and change different aspects of your life.

#1_It starts with your mindset.

Your mindset determines how you approach change in your life, and it also defines your success.

[bctt tweet=”Your mindset determines how you approach change in your life, and it also defines your success.” username=”LivingHappy_Now”]

If you stay in and accept a negative mindset that’s also how you will approach everything else in your life; your social life, your job, your future and the way you reflect and respond to yourself.

What you tell Yourself is also what you get. Our mind works as a magnet… so, if you think that you’re not good enough… that you don’t deserve to be happy… or that you’re not beautiful enough to get what you want, that’s what you end up creating and attracting into your life.

But if you tell yourself that you’re worthy, that you deserve to be treated good and have the things that you dream off, then that is what you’ll get.

#2_You need to pamper yourself.

Self-love can seem a bit self-indulgent and self-absorbed to some, but self-love is incredibly important if you want to improve your internal relationship.

[bctt tweet=”Self-love can seem self-absorbed, but it’s vital for improving your internal relationship.” username=”LivingHappy_Now”]

It doesn’t take a lot to see and feel a change, when you start to pay more attention to yourself, but it’s also important to understand that there is absolutely no limit to how much you can pamper yourself. It’s your body and your life. Do what makes you feel good and beautiful.

I personally make sure to have enough time in the morning, to put on makeup and make myself feel beautiful… and then I make sure to make an amazing breakfast, even if I’m eating alone. The best mornings are spent outside in the courtyard, in the sun, with some classical music playing, while I eat my breakfast and drink my coffee.

That is pure self-pampering in my book. It might look and feel different to you, but find what does the trick for you and make it a habit and priority in your life.

#3_Fuel your body the right way.

I don’t want to be the one telling you what to eat or how often you need to eat. We all have different bodies and different needs, but I do want to encourage you to listen carefully to your body regarding what it needs in order for it to function at its highest level.

Food and nutrition can be a tricky subject and I don’t even want to get started on telling you what the “optimal solution” is for you, because in my opinion there is no such thing. But, after years of struggling with my own weight and jumping from weight loss program to weight loss program, I KNOW how devastating, maddening and frustrating it can be to have food play such a huge part in your life… and how much it can destroy your internal relationship.

After many years of testing and struggling with food, I now know how amazing it feels to create a healthy relationship with food.

[bctt tweet=”After years of battling food, I now know how it feels to have a healthy relationship with food.” username=”LivingHappy_Now”]

I now listen to my body, understand what it needs, how much it needs and how often. And I hardly ever struggle with food anymore. It’s just something that I need to survive and be healthy.

(If you want to know more about what exact food strategy has worked for me. Leave a comment below and we can talk more about it. But for this article I want to leave it at the message that food is personal and that you need to listen to your own body and your own needs first instead of always following the next best thing out there.)

Unfortunately, physical appearance often plays a major role in many women’s self-perspective and it can have a huge say in how we view ourselves and how we treat ourselves, but deep down most of us know what we’re doing wrong and what needs to change. We just need to listen to our bodies, be honest with ourselves, respect what we often know is the truth, and start to love what we’ve been given.

#4_You need to protect your mindset against naysayers and negativity.

People. You need to be conscious about the energy you bring into your life. Do you surround yourself with negative people who live on drama, misery or frustration? Or do you surround yourself with people who inspire, motivate, and makes you feel energized and happy?

You mirror the people you surround yourself with, so why not chose to be around positive and life-affirming people?

[bctt tweet=”You mirror people you surround yourself with, so chose positive and life-affirming people! ” username=”LivingHappy_Now”]

Media. After I decided to love myself more I also decided to protect my mindset from negative media, such as the news and too many negative movies and shows on TV. Instead I try to focus on positive media as much as possible.

Replace hours of reading the newspapers or surfing the internet and filling your mind with horror stories or entertainment, and start spending hours, or at least minutes every day, reading inspiring literature that strengthens your mind and inspires you.

“Positive media” is anything and everything that emphasizes the good in life or how to improve your living standards and the living standards of others.

Would you ever consider making a serious effort to learn how to love yourself more? Or, do you find it self-indulgent and self-absorbed to spend time and energy on yourself in this way? Maybe you already love yourself and know that you treat yourself as a best friend should? If so, what is your secret… Do you have any tips and tricks you would like to share? Please go ahead and leave your thoughts in the comment section below.

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